progress, or so it seems

so i decided to tackle emptying some of the boxes in my room and that process has been going on for a lifetime as i have pack rat habits (not quite hoarder, though i could get to that point if i had the space and funds... come see my storage unit sometime... i should see my storage unit sometime... it's been more than a decade since i've been there and that place would have paid for a luxury car, full size, at least... it's coming up on twenty years since i first put my stuff in it... crazy, i know... let's not depress me by calculating the cost, m'ok?)... it's a deep rooted habit and the reasons are even deeper than i've discussed in a long long time, but suffice to say (until someone sits next to me and looks into my eyes and convinces me they really want to know and go that deep, which leaves a permanent mark) it is traumatic akin to facing one has ptsd because those boxes hold the world i created once before the betrayals and also the dreams of sharing i live for and opening, sorting, disposing, and unpacking brings it all back in waves, some tsumani-seized flinging a million tonne tanker at my head (i know, just go with the analogy... or metaphor if you like)...

sigh, i really ought to unpack everything after signing this next lease next week...

narf :}