the real?

well, as much as this is the daily record of the daily events of the daily life as i live it, there is also some deeper ponderings popping up now and then and while those sort of introspective self-analysis type of ponderings would usually appear behind the candoor (and before then, candora or on downbeats, the lands of the mostly dead, just like when there wasn't time to go behind the candoor and the deeper inverted (or is that introverted?... can one be an introverted exhibitionist?... i suppose youtube is full of them, and tv, for that matter… maybe we’ve discovered the definition of celebrity… anyway… what were we saying?) thinking appeared in RealTime™ when there wasn’t time to go behind the candoor (was the repetition planned for emphasis?... oh, would that be telling, not to be confused with the telling, or the telling that sang guardian angel and other beautiful ethereal songs... but there are so many others), so even here amidst (e)thereal, beware the emo!...

yes, ok, i confess, i am emo in (e)thereal world…

and we wonder why i am still alone in this world, aye?... but the fact is that most of these entries are not out there in front long enough to be noticed or read unless you are checking in here several times a day or simply keep (e)thereal open in a tab in your browser all the time and refresh several times a day (and if you did that, oh, the places we could go... from seuss to noose and 'round again as the previous entry and those before, especially this week, expose the emotion {and touch on history} all the more... it is our experience, all we've ever been, done, or known, that brings us to who and where we are today, after all... the choice is acknowledging and embracing it all {and our self} or ignoring and losing it and pieces of self... i'll continue to strive for keeping in touch with all and therein keeping myself whole... because i care because caring is better than the alternatives... and trying to share because sharing is the best i can do in and with this life and you... which is why i am here)…

and we wonder why i am still alone in this world, aye?... yeah, so anyway, i would stay awake, just to watch you breathing cuz i really don’t want to miss a thing… who else loves that way?... that much?... that constantly?... that completely?... that ad infinitum?... 42?...

yeah, even the babble is (e)thereal from time to time because i am nocturnal… no matter how much i resist… and i want to love all night long (everybody, but you know, all i ever needed was the one)…

be beautiful tonight :)