i need a hug

i recorded the game last night and am recording the game tonight because there is always hope, at least in my mind, but i know jackson will not want to watch or hear even as she forces herself to check in as the cubs seem to be self destructing and it's just halfway through the second inning which is ridiculously early in the game so stop the stress (how?) and start sending the cubs all the positive energy in the world even if it drives craziness into the brain and increases the twitch above the temple (actually, it's not increasing and may even be subsiding and i might know if i was paying attention but i am in a seriously powerful distraction mode that can only be reached by super heroes, geniuses, and the partially insane and i will leave it for you to try to figure out which one or more of those i might be as i continue this babbling and lose count of how many entries have been written in whatever time frame it's been cuz timlessness and lack of detail is the way to get lost in babble even as detail slips in excrutiatingly at random moments when you least expect it and am i still in a parenthese and if i am i wonder what i was rambling on about before the parenthese might have started and if i type a close parenthese character would it just me imaginary or would you really be following any of this and if you are, please send a hug or something like it whatever that may be cuz all the positive energy in the world would be nice right about now) and sends everyone out of the theatre screaming as if their hair is on fire...

really?...

narf :}