reluctant softball

i sit here glancing up at the clock reluctant to head out to watch the team we will play today in a couple of hours because last week i did that and filled the coach in on how they were playing (since he got there moments before the game) and he disregarded everything i told him about where to position players on the field and we lost... our team didn't warm up and were cold, hitting poorly, fielding poorly, sad... the other team had only won a couple of games and were just run-ruled in the game before, but they were warmed up and wanted to win... we obviously didn't... so we didn't... so this week i am reluctant to invest my time, evergy, and belief in the team as being disregarded last week frustrated me and affected the way i played which probably affected the way the team played... so it seems better when i arrive on time with no preparations and no expectations and just let the chips fall where they may, but then, my expectation is a loss because an unprepared team will lose more than win...

alas... sigh... narf...