the most frustrating thing

is that there are several minds i wish i knew today, people who were so very dear to me, important to this life story, and still have a room of their own in my heart... a candle in the window, even... two were from childhood, one was the lustiest lust i ever knew, the other a friend who would play any game i wanted and always let me win... two were from the working years (adult?... me?), one was the most unconditional friend i ever knew, the other was the one who may have known me best and read more of my writings than anyone else (as far as i know)... there are a lot of others, some children i loved and made my own in my heart, some who were known to me only through words, pen pals, but words meant so much... especially when words are all we have...

i would buy them each a gibbs mug if they came to visit...

but a more serious, realistic wish... i wish they would come to this party, not just today, but every day so they could read the life i live and know me today and just as much i wish they would share the life they live today with me because for me, caring does not end and i want to know and would help if they needed it... hope for happiness, but caring no matter what... we don't live forever, and i will be there for them when life gets challenging, because, as i said, they still have a room in my heart...

the most frustrating thing is we don't share all this fun - or keep in touch...