Thursday, May 14, 2015

why so down?

yes you, i am asking you... i know why i choose to let myself down from time to time... i want someone to care about me close up and personal and nobody does... and maybe it's mostly cuz i don't let anybody close enough and maybe that cuz i am so tired of lies and pretenses and users and abusers and frightened people hiding in delusions so widespread many will kill to defend them... or maybe it is because i feel the insecurity is like a disease, a cycle of empowering fear, and it repulses me as much as the lack of self-love that leads to useless fat that most people seem to choose these days... and the weakness of shirking responsibility, the pretending there is no choice, the bullshit of human frailty that all the religions shove at people to keep people from feeling empowered, opiate of the masses and worse, religions are the cancer of the masses... sure, make friends and influence people with that attitude, will ya?... right, who cares, right, so bored... maybe random... all the tired horses in the sun, and the next steps started years ago just linked here, what happened to the life i wanted to share?...

where does the positivity go?... where does the hope go?... how do we forget it is all a choice?... attitude, perspective, optimism, hope, it is all choice... what makes you choose the downbeats?... why do you give up?... why do you choose suicide over honesty and life?... old news?... heartbreak?... do you known ptsd too?...

narf! dammit, just narf already...

weak nyuk :}

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Catch up (and know more)

musical distractions

If people had visible signs or meters that told something about them, what would you want it to tell you?

dumb poll (above), smart responders

all the previous poll votes were somehow erased, so, nevermind... ironically or coincidentally or whatever, the results were very close in practical numbers to the results above shown with just three votes, if you understand the mathematics behind that extrapolative reasoning... i will probably remove the poll at some point... it is a ridiculously useless feature...

SEARCH ME

the thing is, with my tendency to babble and meander and whine and allow distraction to take the lead more often than not, even in this blog that sort of meant to merge brevity with focus like some bloggers do, searching for key words does not always lead to specific information about the subject of that key word... but... here is a start at an easy way to search for key words in this blog... use the search box at the top of the blog to search for words not listed here... if ya wanna, that is... and feel free to suggest words to add to this search shortcut section... click on the words below :)

WORK ... JOB ... MUSIC ... LOVE ... SOFTBALL ... KA ... 42 ... LOL ... LAM ... LAA ... ... ...
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