yes, well, ahem

for those clever folk searching for a rotterdam bugler and other innuendos, or even those folk searching for hard core porn (not child porn, mind you, because that would be just wrong, not like the hypocrisy of searching for young porn or schoolgirl porn or virgin porn or any other more legal disguised forms of pedophilia, ya know... kind of like the awkward pauses craig ferguson used to do, only with fruit, i mean, notice how most people picked the smaller fruit?... and how many come on mans did this seriously irreverent parenthetic social commentary get?)...

just turn on the news if you want more of that sort of hypocrisy and shock value scare tactic crap... the news is the most nauseating proof of human hypocrisy of all, except maybe war and sex and drugs and some other stuff...

but seriously (as if that wasn't... shhhh, don't confess too much, you might be accused of honesty), of course you might have put a pair of glasses on your penis and a cigarette between your balls and pretended it was a face talking as you bounced gently up and down on the edge of your bed when you were younger, but we won't hold that against you... at least you didn't inhale...

if you find any of this humorous, there is medication for that...

hungry?...