good night

it feels really good to play well and that's one reason i play softball, for night like these... 4-4 plus a walk, two doubles, 6 runs batted in, 4 runs scored... and pitching just as good, struck out 5 in three innings... we won 22-4... i gave up two runs in the first after striking out the first two batters and feeling kind sorry for the other team...

the work day was the usual... grown people with so much insecurity and power issues... the disrespectful baiting in public... the sniping in emails... it's sadly amusing once you see it for what it is, powerless insecurity... for a fellow director to send emails undermining me behind my back is so ridiculous... and i am doing better than ever not responding to the baiting and responding logically and somewhat tactfully when i do respond... not getting drawn into the arguments and defensiveness and power struggles they seem addicted to is a bit of an art, but it becomes so easy when i am secure and aware...

and then, there is the written gardens and more, the re-connection with one of my most intimate and once trusted writing muses in a private shared blog and more... that has the creative muses buzzing and influences the energy and positivity and confidence and happiness that came out in playing well on the field tonight and the words flowing as they have tonight...

so... lonely, yes... less lonely, yes... excited and happy, yes... and the foolish games the insecure people play are so meaningless when i get here inside... i hope you find your center and happiness and priorities too :)