psychobabble may just be another way to lose a mind

yes, that is what years of education and experience in the field of mental health and developmental disabilities has lead me to write tonight and for no apparent specific reason other than the accumulation (or is that the culmination) of an occasional love of psychobabbling and babbling in general along with being empathic perceptive sensitive and as aware of the collective consciousness and reality of the physical experience as anyone i've ever met and still feel dumb as a rock and lost in the wilderness of humanity seeking the one who is meant for me with all that perfect passion romantic love magic moment stuff because my primary motivation in life is to love someone and share everything and care for someone and that is why i give everything i can to those closest to me cuz at least that feels good while i am waiting for the one meant for me for all the mutual fall in love stuff comes along and that gets me into loops of euphoria and depression cuz people come and go and take and take and i am left looking for the one and someone to take care of as the years pass and the pool of potential the ones shrinks to sad old people who left what i am looking for behind a lot time ago because that's the norm and everybody wants to be normal except me and the one i hope to find but i may have sabotaged that long ago because i lost the one i thought was the one and decided to dedicate this life to finding out why humans give up the purity and perfection they knew as children and i still haven't found what i'm looking for and i may no longer think i will find it or her which is what leads to or comes from depressive thinking which is another way to give up control of life and lose a mind but i don't think my clockwork has gone orange just yet even though it could...

remember that the next time i psychobabble, m'ok?...

narf...