and i clean, and i read, and i listen, and i sort, and i see and i remember, and i ponder and i feel... and i clean, and i read, and i listen, and i file away the memories and injuries and rhapsodies in blue... and i clean, and i read, and i listen, and i find new tears and laughter in the things that remind me that life is real... and i clean, and i read, and i listen, and i re-arrange the story and rebuild the life on what i knows is true... so i have something real in thereal that i can offer to you... so i have something real in thereal to share, cuz sharing is what i want to do...
yeah, so, it is time to explore inside... and i realize how far i have come from myself, how much i have turned away from my dreams, how far down i have turned my energy, and the intensity, how weak it has become... or un-become, in fact, as i have too...
what difference does it make to those who know me as i am today?... and who would want me to return to the intensity i once creative within this body?... who would want me to return to the focus i once created within this mind?... who would want me to return to the passion i once created within this heart?... who would want me to return to the eternal infibity i once created within the ethereal (some might call spiritual) energy of consciousness called me?...
when all it inspired was fear and all the branches of fear - discomfort, jealousy, greed, selfishness, and worse, negative actions against me... so what will become of this weekend?... probably the same that has become of all the other writings of depth and substance and pondering personal experiences in this human life...
Saturday, June 27, 2009
and the intensity
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Catch up (and know more)
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2009
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June
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- yummy soup
- omigosh, excitement
- wow, people are out there
- back to music
- don'tcha just love it?
- sucked into the net
- thought i did this
- someday
- about forty
- cuz he rambles
- popcorn and sprite
- amercian idol rewind
- up to 75
- oh so cool so far
- hungry now
- dagnabit
- first wmp playlist (very unfinished)
- music mixing
- this barren existence
- and so it goes
- approaching the now
- and the tv amuses me
- alright, catching up again, again
- good sleep
- slipping in the slide zone?
- softball tomorrow
- serious saturday
- the secret lies of sleep
- and the intensity
- gotta sleep sometimes
- seriously?
- come saturday morning
- where was i?
- more to do
- but it's too exciting to be sad for long
- delving the depths
- yeah, the catching up
- musical memories
- catch up laters
- did i sleep?
- stunningly blurry
- re-arranging
- softball again
- heading out for softball
- home, excited
- still flying
- poised at the gates
- coasting late
- turn it up
- omigosh, is it excitement?
- starting to organize
- and the excitement continues (hee-haw)
- tripping work
- trips and work
- focusing energy
- yeah, morning
- yes it is
- house is mental
- so close, and yet
- going home early
- crazy busy morning
- what am i doing here?
- fool in a head
- aww shucks
- alright then...
- challenging timing
- getting better all the time
- almost the same old
- morning monday
- to bed, to nap
- fatigue pains
- phew, the heat was brutal
- text alarms and sunday fun
- from chair to bed
- so yeah, right?
- vegging (tv, music, chess, and whatever)
- yeah, bloggin'
- back to work
- right, ok
- gotta go to work
- why the phone?
- sun rising
- awake asleep
- lost in the middle of the night
- eyes blur, mind smiles
- home early is good
- what's that?... dys what?...
- another day, same dysfunction
- not so ideal hours
- must sleep some
- musical rush
- rainout again
- re-training again
- continue trying
- maybe morning
- what madness is this
- loving the music
- patterns
- homeward bound
- helping out
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June
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musical distractions
If people had visible signs or meters that told something about them, what would you want it to tell you?
dumb poll (above), smart responders
all the previous poll votes were somehow erased, so, nevermind... ironically or coincidentally or whatever, the results were very close in practical numbers to the results above shown with just three votes, if you understand the mathematics behind that extrapolative reasoning... i will probably remove the poll at some point... it is a ridiculously useless feature...
SEARCH ME
the thing is, with my tendency to babble and meander and whine and allow distraction to take the lead more often than not, even in this blog that sort of meant to merge brevity with focus like some bloggers do, searching for key words does not always lead to specific information about the subject of that key word... but... here is a start at an easy way to search for key words in this blog... use the search box at the top of the blog to search for words not listed here... if ya wanna, that is... and feel free to suggest words to add to this search shortcut section... click on the words below :)
WORK ... JOB ... MUSIC ... LOVE ... SOFTBALL ... KA ... 42 ... LOL ... LAM ... LAA ... ... ... ...
WORK ... JOB ... MUSIC ... LOVE ... SOFTBALL ... KA ... 42 ... LOL ... LAM ... LAA ... ... ... ...
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