not fun to click on a google search link and find virus warning pop-ups coming up that my virus protection does not notice... so i closed the browser completely and am running a full scan which says it is going to take 116 hours, no 17 hours, no 18 hours, which seems ridiculous, but ok... now down to 14, no 13, no 12, no 11, no 10, 9, 8, 7 hours... strange... 6 hours, 5 hours, 4 hours... 5% completed, 3 hours left... no threats found... 6%, 7%, 8% done, 2 hours left... 9% done... boring... can i open the browser before this is done?... 11%, 1 hour... wait a bit longer... 14%, 1 hour, 75,000 files... that is a lot of files... 16%, 855,000 files... 18%, 100,000 files... does that mean there are more than 500,000 files on this laptop?... seems very strange...
dang and this reminds me, this windows vista sucks to begin with and is so slow and bogged down compared to xp and windows 7... a new computer would be sweet, but not quite in the budget at the moment, ya know?... patience and compromise...
20%, 120,000 files... wait, every email is a file and i have so many emails... that is probably it... i see the files being scanned are .eml so that makes sense, but i must find a way to get better control of the emails, delete more... and make sure the deletes are permanent... windows mail is not the best software, but i don't have outlook set up on this computer... still have office 2007 which also is buggy and i didn't need outlook taking up space when i first set it up...
it's been a half hour or so, 24%, 150,000 files... still says 1 hour remaining... still in my doc and settings but appears to have left emails... i have a lot of images and music on here too, so this number of files may be more logical, though i did not think there were that many... 28%, 225,000... 31%, 365,000 files... in a torrent folder now... don't recally downloading any torrent files... puzzling... more than a million files on this laptop?... what software could tell me how many of each type?...
32% and now into the music files... but it is bouncing around a lot...
and tv provides distraction, on demand as there is nothing on the 1000+ stations that i want to watch (is that sad or pathetic or . . . ah, the answer comes (and how random was this path to it?)... watching Alphas again... the differences and the fears... and clarity (the answer) comes so easily... i relate so well to stories that accurately reflect how people fear what they do not understand or that which they cannot control... and i detest that fear, it repulses me so much, i remain alone...
back to 2 hours left now and 34% and 410K files... well over a million files?... into program files now, however i see a lot of bouncing around, which suggests disorganization in the hard drive file structure... a defrag?.. the last defrag took almost 24 hours... technology should be more automated by now... maybe it's time to move a lot of the files on to an external drive... 2 hours, 36%, 460K files... still no threats... and back to 1 hour, now scanning 1:33 minutes, 50%, 650K files...
cool, there are no commercials for these old alphas... it's the first season... it's the kind of show that i can relate to well and yet because it pushes my buttons at once raising my spirits and hope because someone (at least) believes some of what i believe and also angers me because it portrays the stupidity of fear-driven delusions (aka the real-world actual human condition) so well... too well at times...
and maybe it's time for food, since happiness is sleeping finally and maybe won't stare and beg like he usually does... as for the scan, it's been running 2 hours and says 89%, 9 minutes left, 825K files... i was up switching over the last load of laundry and starting food cooking... comfort food coming...
is this (e)thereal?... well, it's happening in daily life... maybe boring, maybe just daily life... 96%, 850K, less than 1 minute... cooking spaghetti... life is so much fun... but really, alphas has me charged up as i remember watching these shows when they were first on and i remember how much i related to the characters and story...
856,002 files, just over 2 hours, no threats... yummy spaghetti... and alphas...
the question of who is normal is not medical, it is political... if you hear voices, are depressed, are attracted to the same sex, if you believe in god, or believe in nothing... at one point or another society has labelled you with the stigma of mentally deficient...
thank you...
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