age or wisdom

i'd like to say both, but... i decided to pass on the ice bar tonight... besides the fact that i do not want to drink and do not like bars and it's minimum $30, softball practice ran an extra hour today and the ribs still ache and sometimes stab (all that singing last night didn't help) and i ran around a lot more than i usually do because i wasn't pitching for practice because we have a double header tomorrow... at least i think that's why, coach didn't explain... and we're adding another pitcher to the team come next season and i'm thinking it's a good idea cuz having just one pitcher is dangerous in case the pitcher gets hurt and i'm hoping that's why too, but again coach didn't explain... just cuz i'm old, fat, slow, and don't play the game like i once did and the rest of the team are young kids who are better than me is no reason to feel insecure or a burden on the team, right?... yeah, i'm laughing, but hey, that voice is persistent, ya know...

and the sun was hot today, draining fluids and energy... then two hours driving was not a way to rest the legs and then three more hours walking around in the sunshine and heat at the renaissance fair, coupled with some dehydration and some queasiness and headache from eating fair food and i decided that rest was more important than spending money for a unique experience (a bar with the bar, chairs, and glasses made of ice in a freezer kept at 27 degrees fahreinheit) in a place i would not go if it wasn't a unique experience... maybe next time...

i was gonna just nap in the car for a couple of hours, but i drove right past downtown without even noticing and found myself a few miles from home when i realized that i did not get off downtown, so that iced my decision to skip the evening activities and get some rest and a good night sleep for the double header tomorrow... so i'll be feeling the lonies tonight and missing a cool social gathering, but i'll feel better physically tomorrow and we'll have a better chance of winning both games... yay team... boo social life... yay writing to clear my head and laugh at my insecurities and self-doubts and lonelies and so on... boo no partner... yay says the babbler though, cuz so many words wanna jump out of me tonight... and yay you for being here caring and sharing thereal...

see you in babbles :)