sex sicknesses

not that most humans could even begin to answer even part of this question, but do you ever wonder why do most humans fear nudity and pretend that sex is wrong when most humans will do anything for sex?... like spend billions of dollars on drugs, for instance... religious hypocrisy aside, what is behind the embarrassment of nudity and the secrecy of sexuality?... and let's not even begin to get into the lies told to children about all this, lies that lead so many humans to abuse children, but that is nothing most humans want to explore... most humans are so delusional and live in such deep denial, they would be classified as mentally ill if psychology meant anything to them... maybe it is the irrational fear of judgment from others, but humans sure have illogical behaviors and thoughts and perspectives, especially when it comes to sex and nudity...

of course i could be completely wrong about all this and what does it matter anyway, i mean, here in this world of words online... sex and nudity doesn't happen here, right?... what?... you want links or something?... be careful what you ask for, aye?...

narf...

human love

people who want to own love do not know what love is, but that does not stop them from believing they do and doing all sorts of things, including violence, to try to own love... all they get is fear and for better or worse, they call it love...

most of the time human love is not love...

are you missing it?

if you look back at the past dozen or two entries (i mean before this one because after that one will be written after this one, but that's one of the relativities of time space continuums and such that is only sometimes mentioned now and then) you may find yourself wondering whether the writer of this blog has a grasp on reality or by some chance may have lost the sanity so vital to normalcy in this world... but the secret is there is no secret (unless you know it, as that random link might suggest) and the madness is sanity for the ones whom know, but those who tell, well, they may have lost the answer and in their dramatic or desperate search they could find some comfort somewhere out there, never pausing for that moment of reflective bliss and revelation that presents the solution within (and i don't mean the 5% solution either)...

narf :)

by the way

i am away...

rambling on about this and that

what i do, especially when i am bored or not happy with daily life, but also when i am quite ecstatic with life and anything, is ramble on about this and that as i bubble over with excitement and joy or simply find amusement in letting my mind wander wherever it might go based on internal and external factors like thoughts, feelings, audi-visual stimuli, people, places, things, and anything and everything and i could have listed a hundred thousand different influences and stimuli before simply saying etcetera or anything else and everything and beyind that too cuz anything is possible in the imagination and it is the imagination that explodes whenever needed for distraction or focus or all this and the sparkles too... or something like that...

in a few weeks i may have reason to do such rambling on about this and that to distract me from sudden extreme betrayal or pofound pain or deep regret or even some sort of silliness beyond my control and rather than masturbate to the latest companion or other libido fantasies or even, in a pinch, the new att girl, the words flowing seemingly endlessly provide greater expansion of possibilities and therein longer lasting distraction than a few moments or even a few hours of masturbation so sex does not always solve everything even though it is one of the more wonderful experiences in this life that everyone should experience at least once...

of course i should be sleeping, but then, i should be a lot of things... you too, probably... so no worries, just be happy...

narf :)

away

do you have an away message?... have you been away?... where is away, anyway?... well, i am about to embark on a bit of a vacation, a softball vacation, and i had to figure out how to put an away message in my email and on my phone and it took the better part of an hour to get that done... it was the phone that took the time because every time i recorded a message something interrupted the message during the message and that's not very professional to have an outgoing message on your phone at work that kind of rambles off on a conversation to someone else and then comes back with ok, where were we?... ah yes, i'm not here at the moment so...... i finally got the message recorded and you can hear it by calling my office and asking for me and after they say i am not in would you like to leave a voicemail, just say yes... if you say no, then you won't hear the message... yeah, so i will be away, wherever that is (dallas, in this case... i know, i wonder if anyone is warning dallas... look out dallas, and all that)... who would have thought that dallas is away?...

anyway... but seriously, where is away?... everybody always says it in some way or another... i've got to get away... i am flying to dallas on a wanna get away fare, though actually with points, not fare... and there are away games all over the place so away seems to be anywhere that isn't here (wherever here is)...

and practical phil comes through ones again... philip, philamena, philomena, philicity, philippines, what's in a name, anyway... dear phil often breaks the language down to simplicity... bringing felicity, or philicity... so many ways to get away and certainly you know by now one of my favorite is right here, or writing here, to be more precise... writing anywhere, actually... the away in my mind... so now do we ask which anywhere is away?... it's an amazing journey, getting away, but what about the train of thought?... did something get away from you?...

narf :)

and the excitement continues to build (been a while)

yes, the excitement does continue to build in spite of the fatigue and waking up at noon still fatigued is a clear sign of burn out so this vacation that starts shortly (wait, didn't it start already?... i just checked on to our flights which leave in less than 24 hours after all... shoulda woke and checked in earlier though cuz we are in the B group, like B33 which means it's probably a big plane and there are a lot of people ahead of us, about 82, to be precise, but anyway) is coming right on time and in spite of the drawbacks and stressors due to the people involved (it's not really a vacation, it's more like group therapy as the softball team is far from a team and as dysfunctional as any team i've ever been on and we never know which personalities are going to show up but odds are there will be much more laziness and drama than hustle actually trying to win games, but anyway) we will make it work for us (jackson and me) and enjoy the heck out of every moment (we hope) and so, the excitement continues to build...

jackson is still out working and i will hopefully not get too many calls but we leave this evening to drop happiness and curious off at jackson's parent's house and we will sleep there (cuz it's another city) and leave from there in the morning (we booked our flight from there) and arrive in dallas tomorrow morning (about 10am) ready for fun fun fun...

are we ready for some softball? :)

empty head

i should be excited as fuck, or something like that... i know, that word is so inappropriate for shallow sheltered minds that do not see the ironic diversity in the language so many call offensive, but it is ridiculous that anyone would choose to limit their mind to the infinite possibilities of language that are just a fraction of the infinite possibilities of imagination that makes up but a fraction of the infinite possibilities of possibilities (you must remember this, or forget it, your choice)... but instead, i am wonky... overtired... brain fried... and the amazing journey of limitless emptiness is only matched by the emptiness currently filling my head... yes, that is what i said, or wrote, and if you only get a fraction of the message, you may have enough to survive...

the genius is not in what you are reading, the genius is in how you are reading it...

narf :)

missing caffeine

starting the day with caffeine diminished my appetite and had me going twelve hours later not even realizing twelve hours went by and then after getting home another four hours of walking working washing and doing around the house stuff brought me to this (whatever that is) in spite of the fatigue of a one hundred hour week without pause (or poise microliners, for that matter) because cuteness like kelly ripa or deep sensuality like mila kunis or nonchalant adorability like meg ryan or milla jojovich or, well, this is not what i was saying but doing it feels better than sleeping so whatever is going on it is presenting these words to you even if you never find them or appreciate them if you do, amazing is in the eye of the beholder, like everything else...

sleep may be wise and even bring wisdom but sleep deprivation, like many other drugs, bring so many other possibilities... some people stop at the yellow, some choose a path less travelled, neither is right or wrong, both are as you want them to be...

the fruits of late night television are found on the craig show, in case you do not know...

narf :)

thirst comes in many flavors

there may be profound meaning in some words on the internet and if you find anything like that around here, feel free to alert the press... or the president, at least, because the world needs more pickle juice and if all it takes is a piece of paper like credentials to open the door to success, why do we bother with keys?... what if you never flossed, never brushed, but rinsed your mouth with antiseptic mouthwash for five minutes every day?... when the results of that experiment comes through, we can take on the stupidity of political ads... vote for me because the other guy sucks and you are stupid enough to buy this without noticing i suck too... september and october tv is so badly stained by political insults (insulting our brains more than anything else) that it is challenging to stick around to watch any shows... please save us with irreverence, mr ferguson...

nothing to drink besides water and i don't feel like water so i go thirsty because i'd rather have something other than water and all there is to drink is water... tell me about the children dying of thirst in the dessert... clown socks save the day...

snarf...

this could have been anytime

or any time, for that matter... for the random thoughts that form the expanding meanings of the recent entries might have all been one long stream of consciousness broken up by a lack of evergy or some missing cohesion and good old add or even simply an insatiable desire for attention hoping more entries will be more attractive to you than one long babbling massive missive... morgan freeman shops at sears or penney, or somewhere like it... hey jc jc won't you fight for me... la la la...

are you really ready for annabelle?...

narf :)

there is so much more

i was thinking there must be more, but that though is just forgetting that there is so much more everywhere in this infinity of space and time and that includes the ethereal stuff bubbling around in my head that i suppress and repress back into compartments in my sub and unconscious simply because there is not enough time (or energy as i waste away in the body, by my standards at least... there is a week long softball tournament about to happen after all and i can still fake my way through a 5k and finish top few in my age group and with a month or two of actually working out, could likely win my age group, but my standards are not age based or human based so nevermind all this comparative analysis and get on with whatever it was i might have been thinking before i was distracted by these other thoughts) to ameliorate (whatever that means... sometimes words just pop up on their own... yeah, the repression and suppression may be subsiding a bit this week) and castigate (i don't think i meant the meaning of that word, but then, who knows what lurks in the shadows of the sub and unconscious, after all) and regenerate (i know it was one of those 8 words) the depths of pondering and imagination and creativity that lay dormant while i muddle through the daily working world like the happy idiot jackson sings about...

yeah, so much more...

narf :)

alrighty then, maybe now too

sometimes it just feels good to set a goal even if the goal is not conscious in the moment and to reach that goal even if it is a rather unplanned and minimal effort goes into it because, at least from one perspective and one reason for joy, that is proof that the brain is still functioning well above (and in all directions) normal parameters and there is still a bit of me inside yawning as it glances out at the world and this rather conformist live i live... for those of you who do not have an alien (or in some languages, another soul) inside (or have simply never found him, her, or yourself), this particular paragraph and the thought it contains may be meaningless or even confusing to you, but your chose to be baffled or ignorant, while sad, is not any reason to walk away (or be upset even, especially not with my pointing it out because my pointing it out is more caring than you do for yourself, even if you do not see, realize, or understand this fact) so take a deep breath as i am doing (because deep breaths are the norm for the alien (or soul being) and let yourself relax and maybe you will feel a bit of the energy of the eternal infinity (some call the energy concept god) and matters will find their place peacefully within you even if chaos remains all around you (or vice versa)...

trust me, it happens, even if we never know...

narf :)

billy joel said it

so until you get here or communicate or the one comes along to save me, i can enjoy a dream of someone from afar, someone made up of a face that excites or melts me (preferably both) and a character appealing to my interests and sensitivities and someone like her fits that bill... and recently her online presence is growing in leaps and bounds and fans have been busy much and without lying or trying, i actually got her just by answering honestly (oh sure, such a lonely word... but mostly what i need, ya know?)... though on this one i didn't maybe cuz the questions did not have answers that were me (some had none)... anyway, i could so easily crush on her...

so would you like to swing on a star?... till tomorrow, at least... sometimes a fantasy is all you need, or so it goes (and so it goes)... i may continue this fawning over jenna some other time, at least until the one arrives... or the next crush...

narf :)

where are you?

yes, you... and you too... no matter where you are hiding, or not hiding... whomever you are... wherever you are... you... especially if you are not here because if you are not here i don't know where you are and if you are here, well, i know you are here but i don't know exactly where you are, but i know you are somewhere... if you are not here, i don't know if you are anywhere... so where are you?...

you may have missed my rejoicing earlier and the pondering i did about the stuff on the right recently and two entries a day (on average) that are added to the (e)thereal blog and i just want you to know you are missed... there are more than 5800 entries in this blog alone, how many have you read?... they are all there for you, even the ridiculous ones that nobody will take seriously and even the ones that will likely offend some people, maybe even you... i don't mean to offend, but i do ramble on freely about whatever comes to mind and sometimes my mind explores radical views and sometimes i get really down on things and sometimes i just play mind games with myself and friends and you might not understand that, but you can always ask... it's always good to ask what someone really means before you decide to be offended, after all... especially when someone does not mean to offend you, ya know?...

see, my tongue was in my cheek there, did you notice or did you think i was rude of haughty or offensive or something?... egocentric, well i never (stick my tongue out in your general direction)... so where are you, really?...

huh? :)

time to rejoice!

yes, you see an exclamation mark in the title, it is that amazing... and if kaspersky lets me use my computer, i shall tell you about it... it is a blessing for me, me being a foodie with specific tastes... this is the place... and this is their menu and this restaurant has, on first impression, become my favorite restaurant in florida and, again on first impression (which can be skewed by extreme hunger and being in a celebratory mood before we even began), may be in the all-time top ten of italian restaurants for me... we shall see how cristopher's fares after ordering a few times, but right now i will consider it #1 delivery place and #1 italian place in orlando for me... it's a miracle!...

and now, i think a nap is in order...

narf! :)

food food food (and iced water)

i don't know how many others, if any, experience the thrills i experience doing some of the simplest things in this life (at least simple in the lucrative western world)... perhaps it is because i enjoy this body's sensuality so completely that the simple experience of drinking ice water... that's why i love food so much and once again today i am giddy awaiting delivery of a buffet of italian foods... eggplant rotelli, spaghetti carbonara, and three subs; meatball parm, veal parm, and sausage, peppers, and onions... soon i will be in savory sensory heaven once again... and ice water... i think everyone should experience their senses as i do...

i guess it is also just living in the moment... no matter what is going on around me or in life, i can find a simple moment of bliss and peace inside even without sensory stimulation, but the senses (and not just the taste buds cuz running and exercise and singing and listening to music and watching clouds or reading or... so many things make moments blissful) know no inhibitions and that makes life so wonderful...

the food is here, so with much bliss i wish you a spectacular day :)

two dumb bugs

my living space is not a friendly place for insects... i just don't like insects in my living space so i use all sorts of insect repellents natural and chemical around the outside of my living space and some safer stuff inside my living space cuz, after all, we have animals that live on the ground level... anyway, when bugs crawl or fly into this space, they die... even if i find them and put them out, they usually die if they were one window sills or baseboards... and so i sadly report that two love bugs (you know those, the black flying bugs that fly in pairs attached to each other) were crawling aimlessly on the kitchen floor, no longer attached to each other, just experiencing a high before death... so i picked on up and put it next to the other and they snuggled and seemed much happier as they died together... ok, so maybe it's just me reading into their emotions, but can you prove they weren't snuggling and happier?... yeah, so anyway, they died a bit sooner than they would outside (they only live a few days after they mate), but at least they died together...

emotions or not, they obviously missed the sign outside that says bugs should stay outside... maybe they couldn't read...

narf...

surprise may be pretense

peter's son beat adrain's son because peter beat adrian and that's just what you're supposed to do with a child who does not listen?... perhaps the pretense of being civilized is showing through a little even to the masses of people who ignore the starving children, the bombs we drop on them, the military industrial business designed for killing and conquering, the priests fucking children, the men beating women, all the violent games people play... pretending you don't know or claiming you don't believe (or even truly not believing) does not make it any less real just as convincing yourself that you do believe something does not make a delusion real... there is a pathetic waste of energy in this world and humans are the the ones choosing to do it... so why be surprised that violent people do violent things... keep the pretense of goodness alive in your delusion, it doesn't work in reality... where do you live?...

seriously, zombies, vampires, werewolves competing with scripted reality shows and ridiculously rich people who can't find satisfaction but struggle to find it by breaking cultural rules and drowning in guilt trips... did it all really start with the bible or did the stories before that get lost in history somewhere along the line... do you really want to know... probably not, which is why there is no need for the question mark... but don't run off, everybody needs an intern...

or someone to fuck...

narf...

busy beyond time

the new record score is 367807 for what it's worth... work fourteen hour days and then some, the phone rings day, evening, and night... sleep is intermittent... eating is emotional... exercise is nil except for softball... softball is on hiatus in all leagues but the sunday leagues... belly grows... taste buds crave... neck aches... mind wanders... brain cells overworked... aloneness reigns... and there's just less and less time for silliness... and what's a life without silliness, after all...

what?... sleep... yeah... nite...

narf... i think :)

stuff on the right

words, links, even a telephone number... stuff on the right of this blog... that right column is full of stuff about me, from me, and about things about me, around, me, and stuff like that... stuff, you know?... information... input, number five... input... and i wonder who, if anyone, ever explored all that... who read the words... who clicked on links and read the words there... who cares...

while much of the time i am writing in oblivious bliss in my own mind and it doesn't matter much if anyone ever find this blog, these words, or me... sometimes, like right now, i really want to share... attention... communication... so i look at all the words and realize why they are there, the stuff on the right was written and linked and put there in moments like these when i want to share...

anybody out there? :)

people are so stupid

this is what jackson's listening to tonight... whadya whadya whadya want?... distracted by tv, are we?... satisfaction is so typically soap opera stupid it is almost twisted... the absence of logic creates senseless conflicts that distract people from the stupidity of their own confusion brought on by the absence of logic... the absence of sense... writers seem to have a collaborative contest to create stories about the most screwed up people can possibly get as if writers look at screwed up stories and say, oh, you think those characters are confused and illogical and screwed up, well, just look at these fools... somehow people convince themselves that is what is like to be human... right back to the original sin, frailty, weakness, stupidity... so much lack of awareness, how is it possible... might as well watch haven and believe that is real... at least there is some science fiction that goes people people to stories about ideas...

duh duh duh duh... ok, so seriously, are people are as stupid as reality tv and fictional tv wants to make people out to be?... or are people even more stupid because they watch tv?...

whatever, aye?...

narf...

chewing on rice

he was wrong, completely wrong, but the person he hurt does not think he deserves to die or be destroyed... many others, however, want to disregard her much the way he did... killing off his career is taking the bread out of her mouth, but selfish self-righteous indignation is more important than the victim, which is why we publicly rape rape victims and publicly abuse abuse victims... it sells, makes people money, and that is the bottom line for most people... you want to help a victim?... don't take her life or livelihood and let her live her life it in peace... when you can do that, i'll believe you really care... when humans can do that, i'll believe humans might survive their own self-destructive stupidity...

meanwhile, in fantasy sports, a few changes... three players on the pending waiver wire... first up on the wire is josh gordon because he might be reinstated from his suspension... second up is forsett because i'm betting on him to get more fantasy points than pierce... third up is malcolm floyd because i think he has more of an up side than cecil shorts... i still must drop someone during bye weeks to fill in for spots where i have just one player (defense, kicker, tight end), but that is doable especially after the back up quarterback is not needed as much and the plethora of wide receivers and running backs i have allow me to drop the least productive and so, the league goes on, life goes on, at least for me...

dinner was leftover pizza and cheesy baked beans over rice, by the way, in case you were wondering... starch, fat, salt, instant death according to current dietary wisdom... taste buds are not wise... belly bloat... another day passes overworked and overfed and overtired, but yummy content emotionally so i will sleep well tonight... hope you do too, but in a much healthier way :)

narf :)

instant gratification

sometimes we all want some... i get mine by giving it to myself... a long long time ago i used to try to get it from others and there was a time i was close enough to a few others who would share it, but that takes some serious commitment and caring and devotion and love and a whole lot of time in touch, constant touch, like falling in love touch, and i don't have anyone like that in this life these days... i miss it, but i also realized it is a foolish game (thank you jewel) to play for depending on another for some things is a set up for failure... so i gratify and satisfy myself and don't expect anyone else to... it's a better way to secure peace and happiness...

so i can't always get what i want cuz some things require a second person (or more), but i get what i need from myself... feel free to discuss the merits of this way and sharing is good, ya know?...

narf :)

weak rants and such

it is not like 13 monkeys is any better than 12 monkeys, even if one was a major motion picture and the other was a television show, but we can still compare and contrast and judge because that seems to be some sort of mental aphrodisiac for people... especially judging... the value of a person being judged by a relative stranger is just one more but of illogical mentality that may be a power trip, but still does not leave me with any sort of hope for humanity...

sleep

exercise and showers

yes, ok, get with it, deal with it, do something dammit, cuz the fact is that i do not exercise enough, enough being a minimum of daily for thirty minutes and better yet a minimum of an hour a day (more please, says so many body parts, including the brain) and i do not steam the body in the shower as much as i used to, enough being daily and i don't mean a quick cleansing shower which does happen at least daily, i mean a fifteen minute (or longer) hot as i can stand it shower followed by a five minute cold cool down shower... unfortunately, water is precious so i do not do the hour showers i did as a child, but the heat and cool is so vital to the body... dragging myself to the hot tub and pool seems too much trouble but even beyond the laziness, the privacy is the missing piece of that route... i miss my own hot tub and pool... and house, for that matter... regardless of the missing pieces and obstacles, i am doing this body and life a serious disservice by not exercising and steaming the body daily... like do i want to just die?... apparently...

once upon a time i confronted and challenged myself about this more often... that door is not closed, just ignored a lot... stupid choice... maybe these words will change something...

narf...

323620

seriously?... i left here whining about a wings place?... wow, it is a tough time in the old cranial cpacitors and writer's spirit of late... so this entry's title refers to my current high score in this game, as if this is any better... i could have sworn i created a fun and games blog where i could include all the details of my occasional addictions to games... yes, it is possible to have occasional addictions.... for me, at least... but then, i;ve never claimed to be like anyone else... anyway, i probably did and forgot where... so the numbers and such find their way here like everything else in this life...

it was a tough year for the fantasy football drafts... personally, i am not a fan of either of my teams as i don't have any of my favorite players, but i do have the Seattle defense in both leagues... i ended up with the 5th in one that we've been doing for a few years (i won it once, jackson won it once, so we do pretty well in it though the others are good at it too) and 12th in another... you can find the results (and more details than you need) here...

games, gotta play 'em...

narf :)

fantasy football again

it was a tough year for the fantasy football drafts... personally, i am not a fan of either of my teams as i don't have any of my favorite players, but i do have the Seattle defence in both leagues... i ended up with the 12th pick in one that we;ve been doing for a few years (i won it once, jackson won it once, so we do pretty well in it though the others are good at it too)... that left me with:

QB Nick Foles, Tony Romo
WR Julio Jones, Larry Fitzgerald, Julian Edelman, Mike Wallace, Eric Decker, Cecil Shorts III
RB Eddie Lacy, LeVeon Bell, Zach Stacy, Ray Rice, Stephen Jackson
TE Jimmy Graham
K Phil Dawson
DEF Seattle

and in the other league i picked fifth and ended up with:

QB Jay Cutler, Carson Palmer
WR Demarius Thomas, Andre Johnson, T.Y. Hilton, Hakeem Nicks, Rueben Randle, Aaron Dobson, Doug Baldwin
RB Doug Martin, Frank Gore, Steven Ridley, Andre Williams
TE Jordon Cameron
K Dan Bailey
DEF Seattle

this is how my round by round picks looked in this league where i picked 5th...

1. (5) Eddie Lacy RB
2. (12) Jimmy Graham TE
3. (21) Julio Jones WR
4. (28) Zac Stacy RB
5. (37) Le'Veon Bell RB
6. (44) Larry Fitzgerald WR
7. (53) Seattle DEF
8. (60) Nick Foles QB
9. (69) Julian Edelman WR
10. (76) Mike Wallace WR
11. (85) Ray Rice RB
12. (92) Tony Romo QB
13. (101) Steven Jackson RB
14. (108) Eric Decker WR
15. (117) Phil Dawson K
16. (124) Cecil Shorts III WR

and this is how the round by round picks looked in the league where i picked 12th...

12 Doug Martin, TB RB
13 Demaryius Thomas, Den WR
36 Andre Johnson, Hou WR
37 Frank Gore, SF RB
60 T.Y. Hilton, Ind WR
61 Seahawks D/ST D/ST
84 Jordan Cameron, Cle TE
85 Hakeem Nicks, Ind WR
108 Stevan Ridley, NE RB
109 Jay Cutler, Chi QB
132 Rueben Randle, NYG WR
133 Dan Bailey, Dal K
156 Aaron Dobson, NE WR
157 Carson Palmer, Ari QB
180 Doug Baldwin, Sea WR
181 Andre Williams, NYG RB

and as if that was not enough, the yahoo league provides this semi-detailed semi-generic but still interesting and amusing read as a review of my draft, a draft scorecard... and yes, the commissioner called the league London Silly Nannies so yes, i named my team appropriately for the theme of the league... as for the draft report card, they think i did better than i did (they gave me an "A" score, the only team to get an "A"... they gave one A- (the commish got that) and one B+ {the guy i play the first week got that), two B's, one C, one C+ {jackson got that}, and a D), so there's hope for a championship, maybe :)

Led by a Quality Group of RBs, Mary Poopypants is Built to Win

Draft Summary
Learning to handle success will be the biggest obstacle for Mary Poopypants, as they figure to be at the top of the standings all season. They are expected to go 11-3-0 (1,602 points) and finish in second-place in London Silly-nannies League. They wanted to shore up any RB concerns early, using three of their first five draft picks to draft RBs Eddie Lacy (first round), Zac Stacy (fourth round), and Le'Veon Bell (fifth round). These guys could be the key to the season for Mary Poopypants, as they are the most prolific group of RBs in the league.

With a draft like that, you might as well make it official. Nominate yourself for the Toyota Hall Of Fame.

Schedule
Week 11 is not looking like a fun one for fantasy football. Mary Poopypants should look into the joys of scrapbooking, or bird-watching, or just keep Mary Poopypants away from the TV. It won't be pretty. They have four players and the most projected fantasy points on bye that week. Based on their opponents' projected points, they have the easiest slate. In addition to having the easiest overall schedule, Mary Poopypants has the softest last four games of the season.

Draft Notes
Good Luck With That One!
Mary Poopypants will have some intriguing decisions to make each week at WR, with a narrow projected points difference between their third- (Larry Fitzgerald), fourth- (Julian Edelman), and fifth-ranked (Eric Decker) wideouts.

Strength in Numbers
In order, the three best positions for Mary Poopypants are TE, DEF, and RB.

May The Odds Be Ever In Your Favor
Mary Poopypants might need to consult a fortune teller each week. Their top-drafted QB (Nick Foles) and second-drafted QB (Tony Romo) have similar seasonal point projections.

Close to the Vest
Mary Poopypants was focused on a squad with minimal risk, grabbing seven "low-risk" players out of 16 picks.

Team of Champions?
Mary Poopypants is fielding a team of fantasy MVPs. Last season, three of their players were among the top-20 players that were on the most championship rosters across all Yahoo! leagues: Eddie Lacy, Jimmy Graham, and Zac Stacy.

Was That Good for you, London Silly-nannies League?
By racking up the most projected points in the league during both the first and second halves of the draft, Mary Poopypants established itself as a fantasy contender.

wingstop

appropriately named as after eating a few, i could only think stop these wings from going into my mouth... small and dry and poorly seasoned and expensive, so it doesn't get much worse... thumbs down on all measures... their sides (i tried them all) are ok, though expensive and just ok... disappointing as i figured a place that only serves wings and charges between 70 cents (for 100) and 90 cents (for 10), i was hoping they did wings right... not even close... seldom do i try a new place and say never again, but that's the rating wingstop gets in my mind... never again... next time i want wings i'll try to plan ahead and go to costco while they are still open... anyway, i know you could not fall asleep tonight without this information so i wanted to make sure you got it... as a public service, you know... and now you can tuck yourself in and say nite nite...

yeah, it's gonna be one of those nights... emotional stress riding high due to too many hours working and too little income for the expenses and giving into the comfort foods that bloat and lay extra weight on this body which is a self-destructive cycle as the comfort food relieves the stress wonderfully until the next day (or later, at least) when i realize i should drop 30 pounds and do more exercise and so on and la la la, if you know what i mean... now i hope you went to sleep after the last paragraph cuz this one could be worrisome if you love me, so let me reassure you that i am still loving life and me and will find my way back to a relatively stress free balance eventually... if i live long enough (but don't let reality upset you, laughter still reigns supreme around here... especially inside... just processing the stressors (enough venting in previous entries, roll back and read past entries if you want to know more) in my own way...

sleep well, and stay away from wing stop...

narf :)

34230

no, that's not a zip code... that's my high score in this online game that i became addicted to last night and as i do from time to time when i have the time or when i am simply looking for self-indulgent stimulation for my mind, or distraction, i spent many hours, all night in fact, playing the game... word games, i love them...

the eyes are begging for sleep and i've already nodded off in this chair a few times, so off to bed i go...

narf :)

i almost bought wings tonight

craving some fried chicken and unfortunately, there is no fried chicken nearby... i mean, the nearest kfc is several miles away, five or six or seven, or something like that... kfc is about all i do for fast food chicken mostly due to the familiar taste... popeyes, maryland, and all the others just do not cut it for me for taste or freshness or cleanliness... i might crave some junk food a few times a year and some times the craving lasts for a few weeks especially when it is as much an emotional craving as it is a taste bud craving and i am going through such a junk food craving recently... taco bell has satisfied it mostly because it is directly on the way home from work... checkers is a little out of the way and i stopped there once or twice in the past month... haven't done the kfc yet, but almost tried wingstop tonight but they have some rules about credit card pick up that made it inconvenient (i didn't want to go out and they wouldn't let jackson pick up on her way home without the credit card)... anyway, other entries (you never know when or where a bit of me time might actually happen... or why, for that matter) will likely touch upon some of the reasons for the cravings (emo and stress and after caving in once, taste buds) if you are interested...

i didn't though... buy wings tonight, that is...

narf :)

drained

and no incoming energy in site... yeah, i know, can't depend on anyone else, what matters is what comes from inside and there is no reason more energy can't be generated cuz it's all in the mind and it is just a choice... tonight, i just feel the aloneness and pointlessness and fatigue and unfortunately, because of life choices i've made to be less social than i have been in the past because i am just not getting the depth i want from anyone i've met in recent years and i am not in the mood for the pleasure of surface fun that i appreciate and enjoy when i am in the mood, i am sitting here grumpy alone in my depths where no one wants to go... at least no one i've met in this life... and while trying another life is an option, i like me and this life... even if nobody else wants to come into the depths with me... and even if there is someone out there with the same or similar enough to be compatible depths out there, i don't feel like going out there at the moment so i am here, alone, feeling like nobody cares enough to want to come inside... tonight i feel too giving and wanting just a little appreciation from outside of me... yeah, yeah, yeah, and you can always read the last entry if you're bored with all this self-indulgence by clicking here, but then you'd miss the magnificent next paragraph epitomizing the quintessential essence of everything, which may be no more than continued self-indulgence unless you are intelligent enough to be aware enough to be conscious of the facts of life, the truth, the whole truth, and hand to hold so help you everything, which includes me, of course...

fatigue, sure, but just settling down into myself and looking around and accepting that nobody in the physical world cares to visit me here... and i understand why, it's too deep too sensitive too intense too demanding too visceral too open too honest too free too fearless too dichotomous too egocentric too altruistic too silly too serious too irreverent too secure too chaotic too confident too insecure too infinite too real too balanced too unpredictable too literal too much... just being part of everything like everything (and everyone), but too consciously aware and able to let it all in and let it all go and let it all be knowing what that means... too unconcerned with what anyone thinks and too addicted to love and too independent and too trusting and too loving and too caring and too sharing and too what?... too curious?... too extreme... too many words... words... words... words... words... words... words... words... words...

when you get here, you can decide for yourself...

semi-useless stats

WEEK, MONTH, YEARS

i could include graphics like the one to the left that shows the browsers chosen by visitors over the (top to bottom) past week, past month, and all six years of this blog's life and other stats, but then, what does it mean beyond the visitors (humans or bots or spiders or aliens) have the sense to use the microsoft browser less and less over the years and that's not exactly meaningful information to begin with given the limited subject pool in this abject experiment loosely run by the google stat programs and not too well at that... i would love to know who visits and when and why (it's the why that matters most to me) and what each visitor thinks of that i put here (and everywhere) which is another reason i look at the stats google blogger provides even though they do not offer any real insight because they are so unreliable (from my perspective, at least), so just in case you are not a robot or a spider or any other anthromoric representation of a none human visitor, feel free to satisfy my curiosity and share something about the why (and anything else) in the comments...

cuz comments are happy pills, remember? :)

so luminosity, aye?

are there chat features on the site?... well, i looked around after asking that and found none, but then, they offer little more than a few brain teasers for those of us not paying for their service, so perhaps there is something behind the green door, or is that a curtain, not that i am asking really... i would like to meet some intelligent open amazing minds though, which is what got me thinking about sites that might attract such minds and a tv commercial reminded me of the potential of a site like luminosity... i played with their tests a bit and may ask around about it some more...

so yeah, there is that annoying buzzing of dissatisfaction in the air these days that comes from over-taxing myself as i am physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially more than i have in quite some time... missing a director and a manager at work (the hiring process takes so long for DON positions) places all of the nursing decision responsibilities on me... training a new office manager places much more of the daily operational responsibilities on me... so way more work time leaving way less non-work time... and then there is the financial drain at home which is worse than ever as jackson is changing jobs and not covering many of her bills so there's little or no house money which defeats the purpose of sharing space and expenses, but family is family and jackson is my family... still, the stress of draining savings and needing to tighten the belt a whole lot more is not fun... other odds and ends are floating around too... it's a phase... and likely the reason i am wanting to find another mind like mine to share some time...

update the next night: luminosity tells me my email address does not exist in their system, which means they are having a glitch or the system deleted me after i visited last night... not a great welcome so i told them that and perhaps i will check email to see if they respond one of these days...

still looking for those minds, ya know?...

narf :)

from russia with whatever

love to me love, love, but love so silent, love based only on faith, love just referred to in delusion or fantasy or self-mockery (as is the case right here in river city, or this blog, for to be slightly more precise... but just who is bill anderson, anyway?... is he mr. anderson?... when you get the references, you can exit this parentheses) and what does just sayin' really mean, anyway?... madison?... bueller?... mila?...

i was in madison once, slept on a lawn... in milwaukee i slept in the back of a car until the owner came out to his garage and woke me... they were cool, but madison had better drugs... in any case, what i meant to mean was (or is) something about stats, the numbers being the russia visits are second only to the usa visits and i only know a couple of russians while i know many hundreds of usa-ers and just where hundreds of visits cvould be coming from on either side of the pacific (or atlantic, for that matter) is anybody's guess...

sometimes i wonder if nancy grace is a control freak using fear-tactics to earn a paycheck or is it all an act?... ok, so i only wonder it on those rare occasions her commercial interrupts a show i am not dvring through, or when i forget i am watching a dvred show, but that's beside the point... as is this paragraph...

there are times when i just ramble on for distraction or for attention, which this is can be determined by sticking your finger in any bodily orifice... if you chose an orifice that is above the waste, you are likely seeking attention... if you chose an orifice below the waste, you are likely seeking distraction... if you chose an orifice that is not part of your body, you are likely seeking both and perhaps more, but in any case you should focus on your finger and stop reading now...

and to russia, with love, i thank you...

narf :)

audio visual stimuli

some time in the past twenty four to forty eight hours i sorted many hundreds photos for posting in various places i post photos (here and on four or five facebook pages and a couple or few other blogs {linked to the right there} and might be linked here if i had more ambition for fame or fortune or ego strokes) and i am torn about which place should get which photo and so none are getting any for the moment as i may be reaching that point in the day when decisions can and should wait for tomorrow...

i've got this going on right now because jackson is asleep next to me and she usually sleeps with a fan on but the kids (her nieces) are in her bed sleeping with the fan on and we've only got one fan so the internet provides... it's really a pretty darn cool free white noise site for anyone who likes white noise... it's not a kkk deal either cuz they have pink noise and brown noise (we've got brown noise on, oscillating, in case you wondered... it was the sound jackson preferred)...

of course i really ought to be sleeping, but heck, i often don't do what i ought to do, ya know?...

narf :)