and more

yeah, talking 'bout more words 'n stuff, yup, lot's more, gotcha some more out there you missed again, cuz, after all, you missed this one (smirkalicious) and so, that's life.... and another day given to the work, the job, the human race... and another day missing the life inside and the sharing, the live, the life, the music, the words, the intimacy, the magic, the more...

good day, all in all, hope yours was too :)

time goes by too fast

yeah, a harry chapin song comes to mind and i've been off in my own little world (mind) but this time i might remember a bit more than last time cuz i recall downloading and uploading dozens of videos to the pop news blog that i know everyone just loves to enjoy...

someday :)

it's good to be delusional, as long as the delusions are hurting or condemning anyone, ya know... so otherwise, jackson is off to chicago and it's just me and happiness for the next week or so and i head back to work tomorrow (alas) and i shall find a way to carry the wonderful remembering to explore my own head back with me into the mad mad mad mad (etc) world...

hope you've been great (and now too :)

holy time moving

i was enjoying whatever i was doing yesterday and last night so much that i fogot to come here and tell you about it... must have been fun... it was something about enjoying getting into my own head and wandering the web wherever it might lead and softball in the evening followed by basketball (cuz softball was not satisfying physically) and then cooked dinner and wandered youtube and the web all night and then, slept all day (almost) and the nocturnal clock is buzzing and the excitment of feeling the nocturnal clock buzzing is bouncing all over the place and so, yay :)

wonderful mind

just stopped by to say it's been a wonderful day in my mind, or night, even, and the assistance of wonderful exhaustion from basketball (thanks to jackson and pollack) and the wonderful emo-inspiration from the film rent, which the tv editors butchered but still provided wonderful emo-inspiration, and the excusion into facebook where wonderful conversations actually almost happened (as i responded with my part of the conversation to three different conversations, a wonderful friend from current life offline, a wonderful friend from life offline some decades ago, and a wonderful facebook friend posing a preposterously absurd (or was that coy) video question (or was that my influence?)...

in any case, though sleep called hours ago (and i pretended not to hear it), and sleep would be wise at the moment (as the sun is also rising), this has been a wonderful night that concluded a wonderful day (slept late and watched soccer on tv until the basketball) and in conclusion, it has been wonderful for me to be in my wonderful mind...

hope yours was wonderful too :)

been so long

since an all-nighter was so refreshing... from the depths of the buried treasures (and the sadness that they were buried so long and still remain mostly buried, but at least remembered to the euphoria of remembering) to the pleasures of the momentary experiences of letting music envelope me almost as it once did (shhh, we do not need to notice the almost at the moment :)

the past six or seven thereal entries (and dozens of others, some linked, some not) tell a story of a life, a week, an eternity... and while you had to be here to begin to understand, perhaps you will care to want to know one day and in that wanting, the story of a life continues...

till tomorrow :)

i forget

just how much is in my head, how much more i can create and how much creativity beyond the daily challenges of work and play, the words and music expressing emotion and epotion and devotion and awareness and enlightened thought and new ideas and love in so many ways inspires me and fulfills me and empowers me and then, i wonder... how can i forget how powerful singing is for me... that loss is the single greatest loss i've experienced in this life and how i could have given it away, allowed myself to forget, i'll never fully grasp... and how did it take me so long to remember the music of my own heart... it doesn't get much more real than this...

so with minimal fanfare, hardly a notice, but with seriously wonderful chills down the spine... a new blog is born tonight...

yeah, really

omigosh... not the sudden blurted out omigosh as one syllable, but the oh-my-gosh of wonderfully wonder-fulled wondrous memory re-incarnating feeling so purely sweetly beautiful that there are no words... of course music bring me here again... tonight, the music of jay & the americans and many other related songs found on youtube... righteous brothers, moody blues, association, elvis, four seasons, lettermen, and so many others... so i've got hundreds of vids to download queued up when i finally stop listening as the library grows... oh yeah, really, all i can do is smile :)

music (and lyrics) makes thereal the best place to be :)

growing closer

the list, that is... yes, it's a look around thereal in thereal, this blog page, that is, and we find that the section on the right entitled come a little bit closer just like the old song by jay and the americans (oh go listen, you know you want to) or even this guy, but that's only a deeper reference to the concept of the section and all i am trying to point out (oh really, all?... even gilligan knows better, nyuk and all... oh really?) is that the array of linked pages to choose from (or to wander in order listed) to get to know me better (i.e. come a little bit closer, get it?) is growing to stretch well below the length of the page (being the left side entry length of which i refer to, ya see) and that, my friends, just may be the epitome of defeating the purpose of the brevity upon which this blog was founded...

it is becoming apparently obvious that the babblers have been neglected too long... and that is thereal too...

ups and downs

life has been presenting a series of lemons of late and sometimes, i tired of making lemonade, no matter how sweet it comes out... and while i can continue to find humor in everything, i also tire of having to look for it or create it, i mean, sometimes i just want the sweet humor to just be, ya know?...

challenges at work from a director who refuses to cooperate with the program (she's got a goal to be less oppositional, but she's very passive aggressive so she is only succeeding on the surface)... unfortunately, most people are professionally superficial there, so... challenges continue...

challenges at softball from the male egos who do not team well...
from drama queens who do not team well... from professionals who are fun, but too busy to team well... ah, grown ups just don't team well... that's why there are so few really good teams... lots of talent, but few teams...

challenges at the social community from the human race into which i have never comfortable assimilated... some of the reasons are above, but mostly, the reasons are beyond explanation in common language, incomprehensible and all that... kind of like god...

ah, in the end, challenges are so amusing (if you see things through my eyes)... so i'll just mosey on off as i do every day (and night), singing softly to myself, whatever i am doing, and laughing at the futility of the challenges... while i may tire of doing it, i still prefer sweet humor to sour or bitter or frustrating challenges, so i'd rather be tired and happy than not tired and sour or bitter or frustrated... so never mind, aye?...

hope your day was amusing too :)

mostly anonymous

the ratio is approximately 100 to 1, anonymous comments to actual comments, across my forty-four or so blogspot blogs... goggle does a very poor job of SPAM blocking, as most of the anonymous comments have a dozen links for all the standard SPAM products and words easily blocked with the simplest of SPAM filters... either google supports SPAM or just doesn't care... and that is thereal for today so far...

just realizing

i don't recall (oh whatever) but maybe... changes happened, new space, new roommates, and did i restart the writing like i usually do?... a mark, even?... oh well (well?... well, all's well that ends well, but no end, cuz the changes keep on changing and all)...

felt chest pain today, weird heart-like radiating pulsing sort of into the right arm... moved a bit and it was gone, but oooo, scary for a moment there... just the beginning of waking up the muscles, i say, heart is a muscle too, after all... meanwhile, work is about the same, there have been better days...

but that's it for six days, that's right, not going in to work for six whole days... we hope (smirk... yeah, and don't log in from home a lot either... or take/make too many calls... oh gee, who knows what prfound magic {revelation, realization, re-awakening... omigosh?} the next few days of posts might bring)... so enjoy! (i shall... majorly... and i hope you do too :)

long day smile

ridiculous inefficiency at work as everyone cleans offices and looks for something to do because the network is still intermittent at best and down most of the time... it is an internal network issue because i am able to connect to the server from home... hopefully the IT brains will figure it out tomorrow cuz i really did not want to do much work on my days off (i am taking a long weekend)...

home to eat tuna and veggie soup with no bread and then more basketball... not as much energy as last night (no nap), but still pushed ok and continuing the return to pushing the body (how many more years will it let me do this, i wonder :)

sleep soon, rest tomorrow, softball playoffs thursday (and kick butt at the gym if we don't win it all... hope you are feeling the life in you too :)

oughta sleep

even though i napped a beautiful nap after work and jackson and pollock woke me for basketball about 8, i still should be asleep now... cleaned the office some since the computers were down most of the day... went shopping for lunch... the internet was still not back when i left... good basketball, relaxed, skipping dinner, i think... much better entries in the past week... still, keeping the habit...

a bit of craig and then, nite nite :)

rainout again

so another playoffis pushed back another week and it was a restful day that turned into a lazy afternoon (though i did get a few more boxes empty and the dishes done and put in cabinets)... in the evening, jackson and i played some basketball and went to the gym, yay for her influence (life experience is teaching me that it is exponentially easier to get old and lazy with each passing decade)...

and if you are keeping score (or to say it less playfully, keeping tack because you care enough to want to know), three new closer entries were linked on the right in the past week or few... and the music seeps back into the brain (along with the wondrous smile music always brings)... and life remains wonderful, even as longing for the one continues (which is a smile too)...

what's going on in your thereal? :)

softball later, music now

with softball tonight and nothing planned for the next few hours and jackson at work, i am finally turning off the tv and turning on the music (via my long lost myspace playlist that i forgot about... starts out dreamy, i'm curious to see where it takes me today :)

rest with chinese

woke early enough to get stuff done today like the bank and post office and shopping and a few other tasks and then, back home with a multi-course delish dish of chinese cuisine followed by an even more delish nap... and then the rain poured right on time making the afternoon nap even sweeter, thank you natural forces... woke and took happiness for a walk between raindrops, then jackson and pollock came home and we watched some tv cuz it was raining too much for basketball... polly left now jack's gone to bed and i'll wander the web and write a bit before made...

a productive and relaxing and wonderful day off... hope you made your day a big smile too :)

the world wide web

i find that by googling my name, the first site that pops up is my myspace page and the next few or more are my pages as well, so finding me is easier than ever for those who knew me and remember my name... of course since my name was different as an underage child, school friends might have a more challenging time...

ironically, google thinks searching for me might be a mistake...

and wouldn't you know, if you search my facebook name, which is bugs webbot, bugs pops up first there too...

wanna find me? :)

wonderful night

another busy day at work and i didn't get to sit at my desk more than fifteen minutes, so the work (my work) backs up again, but each month the juggling gets easier... after work we went for sushi, yummy, and then, to see chicago (the musical)... standing ovation and home to enjoy the wired theatre rush...

not bad for a work day... hope you had fun today too :)

lots of work, home, gym (rainout)

busy day of committee reports and metings and the usual dozen other things and then, the playoofs are rained-out, so 9home i go0... and i decided it was a night to eat fish, so i made fish and mashed potatoes and peas and over-cooked the peas and over-salted the mashed potatoes and the fish was good... jackson even cleaned her plate, but she's so polite that she probably would have cleaned her plate if i cooked dog food... well, maybe not dog food... anyway, next time i'll remember i am not cooking for me and pay more attention to the food on the stove...

we found termites or giant ants on the porch, so i sprayed them while the food was cooking... and now, we head to the gym and then, the nba finals, game seven... fun fun fun, and no t-bird...

wiggle waggle?

whatever, aye?... could be bullsugar, but it was also just another busy day at work churning out reports and sharing information about new regulatory standards (that goes over so well)... and then home, walked happiness, eate, and sleepy now... kick back and nite nite...


and how was your day? :)

to bed please

yes, sleep needed... exercising again, and working long and not eating days, must eat breakfast and lunch... start tomorrow, maybe... at least lunch... continue exercising...

sleep :)

sweet exhaustion

took a stab at sorting through the mountains of paper in my office today, made a slight dent... mat up with precious on the way home cuz she got her tonsils out this week and i bought her two gallons of jerimiah's ices and tons of pasta cuz all she can eat is cold pasta and ices, basically... and then, giovanni's for dinner with jackson and pollock and then, basketball... almost won around the world for the first time and actually won 21 for the first time, but jackson was way off her game and pollock wasn't trying as hard i think they were feeling sorry for the old man i've become on the basketball court... then a young guy showed up and we played 2 on 2 to 16 and two games later (the kid was good so we won both cuz i remembered how to pass and play defense and position myself), i am blessed with that feeling that can only be called sweet exhaustion...

and you? :)

late late again

one of these days, this lack of sleep life will make me singularly the late me, as in deceased, but for now i wake from a moment nodding to eat more tuna and then some babaganoush on crackers and sunflower seeds... i am such a hippie, aye?... hey, somebody's gotta laugh at me, so it might as well be me (when nobody else is around, like almost all the time, cha cha know)... maybe i'll twitter now... what will me facebook friends say... we may never know :}

up late again

working late, eating light (chicken for lunch, tuna for dinner) and then some basketball and the gym, but very whimpy workouts for me... am i officially old (speaking physically only, of course, i don't think my brain will ever understand the concept as something that can happen to me, i mean, even when depressed at times in this life, old is an alien experience in my head)... and bosyon beats la and now, hunger calls... a snack before bed?... you'd only know if you were here :)

posterity knows :)

game time flies

nodded off five or six hours ago, at least, then jackson got home and happiness got all excited begging for attention and the stanley cup finals were on and all ended well, and off to bed we went... or so i thought...

several hours later i noticed that i was playing college bound football... i am going to bed now... hope you had too much fun to notice time (or fatigue) too :)

life continues (burp)

excuse me... they had burgers and fries for lunch at work... i was will-powered and did not eat at work today... i made a burger and fries for dinner...

life continues (burp :)

not impressed, brighthouse

the screen is grey-black, the phone says the network is busy, the website says my email address is not valid (yet i have plenty of email from them, including confirmation that my bill was auto-paid for this month, so they have no problem taking my money), the chat with support doesn't work, the email support is not responded to (at least not today), and so, i pay $2 a day for tv and it is not working today... i expect a $2 refund, plus time spent due to the broken website, phone service, and my judgment for using their crappy service...

meanwhile, it was a good day :}

so instead i pigged out

instead of falling asleep or going to the gym or just watching the ncaa softball and going to bed, i was wired after the game (the arizona pitcher deserved that win, so there) and tore open two bags of chips and made chocolate milk and here i am, wireder (and weirder too) and wondering when the one who will keep up with my madness will turn up (no, she's not a turnip) so i won't be alone in the afterblog...

oh, you don't know about the afterblog?... thought this was all there was?... referencing eternal life?... whatever, i'll explain when you get here...

and now, more chocolate milk :)

almost asleep

yeah, ate healthy (baked fish with spinach and asparagus and garlic and sunflower seeds and some chocolate milk (fat free) and was so nodding off and suddenly, for no apparent reason (or maybe the ncaa softball world series game starting or more likely eating cashews and yogurt for dessert), i am awake and should be considering the gym, aye?... jackson has the gym cards though, so maybe fall asleep watching the game?...

shhhh, ch-ch-ch-ch-changes :)

yeah, more exercise

thanks and keep it up now... unpacking all day, then softball and walked twice (went 0 for 1 cuz I flew out once), scoring both times, one error (rushing a throw) and a few solid ground ball put outs (one a double play to third and second, fast throws, well turned) and then home to the gym for 30 minutes on the elliptical and it feels great… home for dinner and now, shower, relax, sleep…

hope your day was satisfying too :)

more exercise please

yes, the body wakes smiling thanks to extra sleep (about ten hours, yay) and for anyone interested, i will attempt to motivate myself to do laundry today... and unpack a bit... and softball later... it's all about the kit, cha know? :)

hope you enjoy your day too :)

long hot day of fun

slept late, then got lost in researching and reading about insipid political corruption and stupidity and finally left the bedroom close to 5pm and right on time for dinner and then, basketball... a couple of exhausted hours later, home to shower and rest the numb wonderful feeling in every muscle and watch some ncaa softball world series and then, here, and now, sleep...

hope your day was full too :)

this is home

other places i communicate with others are fine for their purpose and appreciated for the time and energy others share there, but this is home, the door is open, and anyone watching or sharing without harming is welcome, even if nobody takes the time to stop by...

and the truth is (yeah, feeling the emo for the moment), it is sometimes disappointing when no one cares to stop by, but the door remains open and this remains my home... when i am silent everywhere else, i am still here (the long and winding road)...

hopefully my friends will know that when i appear to disappear...

home from work early, nap, out to game night at the history center, fun, snacks, and home again...

home early

starting the weekend early, maybe nap, game night at the history center tonight... hope you are having fun too...

after midnight

giving yesterday an entry, but awake way too late to have a very early day with surveyors tomorrow... watched tv, ate pizza, unpacked some, hung with jackson and happiness... ncaa women's softball, would be great except for the rule-makers screwing up by changing a major pitching rule in mid-season so some of the best pitchers are demolished by the umpires... control freaks belong anywhere but sports...

the pizza and dessert and company was great :)

sleep soon...

almost asleep

was amost asleep, no food today, drank a little coffee to keep the headache away, then jackson came home with a friend and a basketball and we went out to play (horribly rusty, i am)... sweaty hot home again, ate some nuts and potato salad with a cream filled chocolate chip cookie for dessert and retired to my room to browse the web until i fell asleep and facebook grabbed my attention for several reasons and here we are...

really ought to fall asleep now :)

fun day, rest and play

slept late, out to dinner at crispers and the movies, Robin Hood tith friends and home and nite nite :)