croen

was it today, this day, long ago, that you were born and i was to have a friend some time later, if but for a moment, a heart that knew how to care, a mind that almost understood me, but more, a person who accepted me, at least for a while...

was it today, this date, a lifetime ago, that you came into this world with so much promise, with such advantage, with the choice of the privileged few (or was that me?) and what have you made of the time, i wonder, as we let go of the communication somewhere along the way...

is it today, this moment, once upon a time, that you went your way and i went mine and now, after so many years, can it be the later we always knew would appear...

happy birthday old friend... wish you were here :)

people are pathetic

i know, cuz i've become one.

fun da

Yes, fun, kind of like the funda, only without the green (for the moment, colors change in time, whether by hand or age or nature, but then, who said we were taking about colors?).

two reflections

The mirror does not show you what you look like, the mirror shows you what you see.

The mirror does not show you as you appear, the mirror shows you what you choose to see.

Consciously or not.

once upon a time

there was unconditional trust blooming in unconditional love floating on an endless cloud of hope... then it all went wrong... now there's just hope, and the remnants of the rest, but unshared, cuz nobody cares... i wish it was once upon a time again.

b

a is for everyone, always open for interpretation, out there, always a...

b is for babble, endless streams of words that may or may not hold secrets or just be meaningless random trivia and free associating mindlessness, including nonsense, or the secret too...

c is the personal, the truth in sheep's clothing, or maybe chicken.

d and e and f can get confusing, so we'll leave them for the advanced class... just let me know when you think you are ready.

more will follow, probably, someday.

realer than realtime?

if i ever get where i am, will i remember who i was?

wants (top ten)

music... i want to listen to music again... with full rich sound in a room and with good headphones... i want a system that will produce the sound with clarity, enough so that the words of the lyrics of Radiohead's OK Vomputer and similar are clearly discernible to my ears... if that is possible (amused)... shopping with the CD in hand would be wise... and to recall and re-record the tapes lost along the way...

love... a much more challenging find, i would love to fall in love again... for better or worse, i have very specific wants in a partner and most humans do not come close... actualize John Lennon's Imagine, for instance, for real... yes, all of it... let go of all learned fears and rules of conformity to be free to do anything that causes no direct (and as little as possible) harm (there are no absolutes)... leave ego behind except as a court jester always ready to laugh as one's self for the follies of imperfections... be a giver to the point where we each must hold the other back from giving too much (regularly)... share everything completely openly honestly... actualize honesty without harm... be open to learning... sing with me, run with me, be the best we can be... understand the truth in the concept that the more right we think we are, the more wrong we can be... be a best friend... and this is where we begin...

knowing time

what is real and what is not is only what the mind can see and choices made within your head determine your reality so ask for more if you believe that more exists or you're not sure if you can see what the words mean and maybe you will find the more that you are looking for... there will not always be consistent meter, there will not always be obvious rhyme, there will not always be making sense, but there will always be time as long as life exists, there will always be time...