or age, as it is life that is fading... life, stamina, strength, resiliency, and will, at least, fade faster with each passing day... when i was in my teens i would write of how i read of people twice that age feeling like they were running uphill even on a flat surface and people three times that age accepting the inevitable sedentary life of middle age and beyond... i wondered why they did that and whether i would when i got there... and each year i wonder more why i am trudging uphill and laughing at the memories of relatively insatiable and endless energy youth... it's like gravity is getting stronger... perhaps it's the mayan calendar thing... oh sure, make jokes (but that's my way, the mttm, remember?... got to give myself the time to process and heal and then i will suddenly soar again... shhhh, am i telling secrets?)...
and the staring dog who just went out two hours ago, or less, is staring me down as if he's never been outside in his life... how quickly we lose the focus of regaining the concentration that creates the will to continue up the hill...
i just can't give myself (especially the physical, which is too easily injuried by distraction when attemting to push it past limits and i desperatly need to push past current limits because current limits are pathetic - yeah, pathetic, dangit) a few hours of undivided attention here... wah wah wah, i did mention i am pathetic, right?... but seriously consuela, i must do this survive... no, you take me out now...
he's like the maid on family guy, sheesh :}
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
how quickly we fade
stuff to do
i called the cafe where we are going to see amy steinberg on friday and there are no advanced tickets and it's a donation-only concert and the owner of the place said there's no cover or reservations, just come and they'll find room... hopefully they don't underestimate the power of the steinberg... hopefully the steinberg still has power around here... so anyway, that little chore is done...
texted back and forth with friends going and then registered for the january 5k for charity which hit a snag with passwords but i figured out how to fix that so i didn't have to re-register on the site again and that's done...
and then checked on the january softball tournament and it's the same weekend as the 5k which is also mlk weekend at jackson's church so bummer... hopefully there will be no games scheduled before 9am and 10am will be better... i think that may have been what happened last year (when i was running more and in better shape)... the coach registers for that as a team and hopefully the coach will be able to make it to this tournament so i don't have to do all the paperwork and stuff and can focus on playing and coaching on the field and not getting hurt... hopefully the arm will allow me to pitch and throw and play too... shhhh, think positive thoughts...
and jackson invited me to her church mlk celebration which is all weekend and she's not sure she's going to do the tournament (big bummer) but hopefully we can squeeze in everything that weekend... including work cuz i hope to be working by then too...
more stuff to do around the house so i am going to stop writing and stay positive and hopeful and try to get more stuff done... are we having fun yet? :)
Friday, October 3, 2008
exhausterated
so another day at work and everybody's got a crisis and people don't show up for the root cause analysis and the manager who supervises those people is locked in her office with a personal dilemma at the time of the meeting so we cancel the meeting and the manager's boss will have to explore what happened cuz this is as close to an investigation as it gets without being an investigation and not showing up is grounds for some sort of corrective action...
meanwhile, the work spills over on my desk and i already put in fifty hours or so this week... the first week of the month, and the second, are usually like this... soon i'll start training my second assistant and things should get better...
and then, softball... interesting how things turn out sometimes... the two thursday night teams had mixed blessings... i went to the work team because the coach of the other team said he had too many males and he'd have to sit some so he didn't need me... so someone else pitched their first playoff game and they lost 17-16... at least they scored runs... so they are out of the playoffs and done... the work team won, 10-4, and i pitched three innings because they were short a girl and could only play nine people...
so with two teams that needed me to pitch all season, i played three innings and definitely did not feel worked out... so i went to the gym and pushed on the elliptical for an hour (62 minutes, to be exact) and pitiful pace, (4.2 mph), but at least i did something with this body other than sit and type... imagine if i had a tv (don't laugh, it's really very sad... ok, laugh, even if you are the only one ... guilt trips make me laugh... so was i laughing at the start of this parentheses?... only thereal knows for sure :)
and then, home, and as i start typing and uploading some rhymes here and there (the mostlydead lands got some rhymes, as did a couple of other places), and then while listening to la cage aux folles {surely a tear jerking emocoaster) i nodded off during the second listening as i was typing (in the middle of a comment during which i paused to upload some of the rhymes)... and now, with the sun coming up, i must shower and rush a bit as i am running late this morning... but hey, i'm still here letting you know the mundane details of the life as i live it, so you are certainly thrilled...
staring at the screen and scratching your head trying to figure me out might not be the best use of your time, you know?... but i do appreciate the attention... even if i'm the only one imagining it is there :)
love you :)