what happened then was

the game started working again when i created a whole new league and basically, a whole new game... the other seasons may be lost and all the time and effort put in, gone, or simply stored in the memory... maybe there was too much for the game to handle or maybe it was just time for a review of the process, the video game diet and solitary occupation (avocation?) of playing with myself while the wheels went round and round within me and without me and i wasn't even watching or much curious even...

so i am diving back into the game now, see ya :)

would have been 1000

yes, if i wasn't secretly (shhhh, don't tell anybody, nyuk and all) slipping an entry or few in the past as i find the writing i've been doing and not uploading (like at the moment, cuz the game died again, i am finding emails/letters i've written to friends old and new and i'm popping the writing in those into entries where they would have been in the time line of life if the words did not find their way into the mail and you'll just gave to ponder deeply all you've missed by not keeping in touch, alas and all, i know, ya know?), this would have been the 1000th entry here in ethereal... wow, aye?... especially cuz it happened in less than half the time... yup, ethereal zoomed past RealTime™ and is fast chasing down all the others...

hope you've been enjoying yourself and life as much as i have, even though i've missed you, even though you probably never knew... the words have been pouring out all along, just as i promised all those year ago... and here they'll be, right here waiting, just as if you've been here sharing all along...

isn't it romantic? :)

almost fixed

the game, that is... I played it for an hour or so before it froze again and now it won't reload... so I am without my distraction and back to pondering what to do next... i need something to focus on for another few weeks, at least, so the cuz i've got 20 or so pounds to continue dropping and this is the way i do it, find a focus and shut everything else out while i let a game or whatever the focus might be occupy and stimulate my head so i am distracted from the insatiable taste buds... it makes sense to me and more importantly, it works (in thereal)... but for the moment, the game is not...

so what else is new?... writing?... here I am, where are you? :)

in the wee hours

this is when i miss the music the most... and the dream of the soulmate who shares the love of music and words and fun and games and caring and sharing and being in love as much as i do... like the way i do, aye mel... wishing you were somehow here again, whomever you are... come out, come out...

meanwhile, back in thereal... i've been playing lots of softball, winning and losing and getting better all the time (3 for 3 tonight, 11 for 12 with 2 walks for the week)... playing monday, tuesday, and thursday nights and sunday afternoons at the moment... and i've been working a lot, every month adding more work to the workload and making slow progress in changing the dysfunction of the system (the hippie fights the establishment from within, aye?)... not doing as much in the social or show going out stuff (as the calendar shows) and still personally intimately and creatively lonely, but loving the softball and even still enjoying the work, so it's all about the fun fun fun until the right one comes along (the beach boys meet art garfunkle meet the stones {cuz they couldn't drag me away}, or something like that)...

but where have you been?...

who me?... well, besides doing all that stuff, almost all my home time has been spent playing the video game diet... that is, i let my gaming addiction take over and replace my food addiction and viola (or violin, voila?... yeah, ok), i finally knocked off a lot of the weight i put on living with humans who eat like normal americans so i have eaten out only a few times in the past few months and have eaten a lot of lean protein and veggies and fruit and healthy fooods and low fat and low carbs and no sugars or chocolates and so on and i dropped 40 pounds (but gained back 10 this week cuz i binged and as if to mock me, the game broke, but it's not a serious relapse and i expect to drop another 20 pounds in the next month or two and yes, who knew)...

so what else is new?...

lots, but that's enough for this entry in the wee hours... if i get the game fixed i might disappear again, so i won't pretend i am back (even though two new blogs started this week... yes, you read right) and more than a dozen or so new entries popped out just in the last few hours (as if the brain never stopped writing, aye?)... can you imagine if there was actually some up close and personal inspiration in my life?... shhhh, let's not scare the grown-ups... so life goes on and i hope you are enjoying yours as much as i am enjoying mine, even if you're not getting everything you want at the moment... even if you've been gone (you're not forgotten)... even if you were never here...

live, laugh, love, and... dance! :)

not really back

but if you hum a few bars, i can fake it...

the game broke

so here i am, back to the words... cuz the game broke, but did the game break cuz i started pigging out this weekend for the first time in months or did i pig out this weekend for the first time in months because i knew the game was breaking or cuz i was tired of the game and missed words and the game breaking was the universe intervening in my hiatus to bring me back here?...

fringe is on...

 

candoor (candoor) on Twitter

this blog almost turned into twitter before twitter became famous... maybe that's why candoor (candoor) on Twitter never actually got much of my attention... for one thing, the video game diet and the softball jones fills almost all the time i have away from work and i still don't sleep (same reasons, see below) so the writing time wanes, or waits, or something like that... somewhere deep inside the writer might be sitting in a corner licking wounds, mourning lost opportunities, and hiding in an invisible fog od depression and apathy, but the kid is loving the softball and the video game diet, even though i strayed from the focus for the past week... 185 appears to be the upper max these days, which is a serious improvement from 220, which was the upper max up until a few months ago... wow, and i still feel bloated tonight (must i pig out to be inspired to write?... who's asking?)...

you know how to respond...

new horizons out to see

seventy thousand words have not been uploaded since the las entry, including the many-odd dozens of entries (hundreds, no less) that would have been uploaded here in thereal had i continued the mad re-connection once begun in book 5 shortly after rejecting the military madness for lent or get bent or pay the rent or to some extent (2, 3, 4...) so don't let it get you down cuz you probably never even knew who lived in the castle, no less where to find it...

two new blogs started tonight, but we shall not go there until we remember where here was (not to mention here here and here (amidst all that's there {what? where?} and anon), but at least, if you happened to stop by here before this entry faded into the archive where rarely eyes ever see, now you know...

people love you, people love me, people don't know what people don't see... people are true to what they can be and most people believe in what they don't see... criss cross your heart and hope to die, but never ever wonder or ask why... so lately i've been busy with softball and work and revising my lease on life through the video game diet (patent pending) and occasionally, other fun, and so the words are not uploaded, but you know where to find me if you want me...

i hope life is smiling inside you and around you :)

completely missed it

the moment of nines, that is...

i wonder what really happened :)