naturally unexpected

no food all day and exercise, softball, and chilled wet, body working hard to stay warm, and sore arm and coming home, craving food, i turn to meat and cheese and bread and potatoes, fried of course, and then the body revs, the blood pressure probably rises, the food circulates... and fatigue brings the aching neck, throbbing arm, over-tired wired fatigue, and then, nutella... craving chocolate, i found nutella in the cupboard, pantry to some of you, and consumed many calories on top of the many calories consumed earlier and then, aching, throbbing, over-tired-wired, i lay back in the recliner and aching, i start pumping my legs, legs out straight pumping from the waist down, and time passes... fifteen minutes, a half hour, and an hour... within that time there was meditation, remembering belief determines perspective as much as anything else and we choose what we believe... and letting go, giving up fear of death and trusting that even if this body dies, all will be well... peace... awareness... belief... just a beginning, but a beginning... again...

there's always hope...