left alone to my own devices, i come into my own peaceful space as the night flows... i choose, however, to not be left alone to my own devices because i want to share and care (actively) and i don't want to just love on the outside of the human race... humans complicate things so much (which can be fun if they trusted, but they don't trust much)... worse is that human avoid peace and the truth of this physical world so much that they avoid me and where i am from, a peaceful real place... humans are so into guilt and blame and pointing fingers at each other and that is so unreal to me, it's ridiculous and it is not always easy to take the forced drama humans seem addicted to seriously (even the science fiction does not imagine much beyond the human drama, as if that was all there could be in this infinite universe)... i spent a lifetime trying to learn how to do it, how to believe it is real and that so altered (and depressed and diminished) my journey in so many ways, but i learned, empirically, it does not make sense and there is no doubt left in trusting my own senses (even though there was none at first and i created some along the way and i gave this life, so far, to the human race, the illusion humans create...
i am ready for a change :)
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